White Noise – Multimedia

Listen to White Noise – Multimedia performance art on Zeno Magazine (Zeno Press) 29th April, 2019; text by Amin Erfani, music by Nicolas Baby, voice by Kate Moran.

This light, this flicker of life, the last on earth. Dark corner, speak, she says she, listen, say I, memories of my life, those silent memories. Long time ago, lost thought returned to me, I thought it lost forever, a voice. No words. No silence. Long time ago, next to this body, someone died of cold, holding pencil and paper. She. By this fire, alone, I, she, dark corner, listen, say. Here. Could she hear those things from past memories, lost completely, could I also hear them. I beg for silence, she for words. Nothing here, but her, could I. Comes this, think of forgotten things, memories, can’t say if she speaks, or listens, in the corner, if standing, or lying, or kneeling, but hear it say, in the dark – This light, this flicker of life, the last on earth, I, lost words, white memories, can’t say anything worth listening to, nothing worth hearing. Born a day here close to a fire, you sit, listen to me say, I was born a day close to this fire. Sound cold dead silence lost words noise. No lost words, if never spoken before. Must have happened before, once, if lost truly, remembered, I think no thoughts. [Short pause] White noise. No words, no silence, nothing left to record, next to the fire, alone, hear this, tape blank, speak her voice, saying nothing, think of things, can’t recall, voice dead, say nothing. But a flicker of life, the last on earth gone. I, here alone, you, she says this, then she says, you can’t understand a damn word of what she says, to me too, a voice says things I can’t understand, she, in the dark, by this fire, thinking, if I, the other, from the other side, white noise. Says it comes in the dark, can’t say, I, she says, she can even say, you, next to me, sitting all by yourself. Next to me, no one, but me, but her, in the corner, hear the sounds, words unspoken, through the one other than you, unheard before, unknown, never knew if you’ve heard the sound of it before, the sound of your voice, speak, once. You I she alone, or maybe not. The night born from this, fire gone, in her, through the one other than me, tell me my memories, now recording; you were born, on such and such a day; tell me a thing unheard, not happened before; you say this and that, maybe add something else; but it says it comes from the dark, says things never understood, don’t recall what. [Long pause] Silences. [Long pause] Silences, speaking, speak silence, me, to you, talk to me, with no words, talk to me through me, things known forgotten, forbidden, lost, forever, left unknown, unspoken, to me, say things, not worth hearing, nothing worth begging, hear me begging, for silences, stop her, this voice, stop – by my body, holding pencil and paper, you died of cold, long ago, prepared to write words, maybe even thoughts, next to this, fire, flicker of life, memories unspoken, in this dark corner, memories white, wordy noise,      says nothing to            know,     have nothing to say,      speak      listen, in here,      sits by the fire, there, speak, not to     ,       carry on listening, not to      , nothing, speak, keep on saying, but stop. [Short pause] Ah! [Short pause] By your body, she died of cold, long ago, holding pencil and paper,– waiting – write the thoughts, prepared to write words, waiting for things unheard, silences. Body cold fire hands bare paper white. Cold. Quiet. Dead. Not dead no, she says, never, long ago, someone, why not say     , yes, the word, why, nothing comes, beg for, – word – a memory for a voice ! [Short pause] No. In darkness, standing, or lying, or sitting, or kneeling, listening maybe for thoughts to come from a body cold, a paper blank, a fire dead, begging for thoughts silent can’t hear in this corner, deep sounds, no meaning, this voice, hear it begging? Listen. [Short Pause] No words, no silences. Not I. Not you.      alone       says      have nothing to say to      speaking to      ,      know, speaking to      ,       there, silent, speaking to      through       silently, there, white words. Now say,      hear a voice      not heard before, lost memories from the dark speak things      do not recall, but a voice recorded. Listen to       say how could       think of thoughts lost, if      lost truly      could not be, but a voice recorded –– Now hear now speak to you from here this memory you can’t recall speak to you in the tomb, now I, hear the voice, say to you, primal scene, the first thought, all true, spoken, in the womb, alas now, lost forever, dead cold, must hear, powerful, true colors, smell, touch, will recall all of it all of it all too well, all too well, sounds unbound to silence recaptured, this story be told, you will weep true tears of reminiscence, of things unspoken, forgotten, forbidden, lost, forever –– [Short pause]      stopped.      don’t know how,        why,       weren’t listening       decided to stop listening       never wanted to be listening,       forgot,       mind drifting, drifting away, forever lost gone,       said,        fell silent, forbidden, forgotten – lost gone, in memories unborn, sounds yearn to speak, beg for        to tell, a last time, one more time, say – [Short pause] By your body, long ago, I died of cold, holding paper and pencil, waited for you, to speak, you spoke, never to me, not before, not again. Now, from this other side, here, I have nothing to do with what you have to say, in here, waited for words to come, your mouth, fire cold, word not once spoken. [Short pause] Once, I can’t recall, I spoke, said things, just before, long gone, a word here, can’t hear the sound of it, your voice speak, in my memory, again, unforgotten, but nothing, not to me, not anymore, be heard, even now, as you speak, never could, make it stop, speak, to the end, to no end, carry on, lost sounds, say nothing, not anymore, fire cold, hold pencil, with paper, can’t recall, long ago, by this body, someone died of cold. The last flicker of life on earth. [Short Pause] No voice comes to her in this corner, on the other side, she, lying, or standing, or sitting, or kneeling, praying, perhaps, with pencil in hand, waiting for a voice to speak, in the dark, a line here, on this page, long ago, a word maybe, can’t see can’t recall seeing it obscurity. Word, written, long before, vanished, in darkness, on page white, unwritten, undone, never was, all along, voice, unspoken. [Short Pause] Here, now, it comes, again, speaking, not to you, never did. A voice comes speaking from the dark, from the other corner of this fire, you do not hear it say anything.

— results from hearing sounds at all frequencies. if audible sounds were heard all at once, you would have —.— is a random signal or process with a flat power spectral density. the signal contains equal power within a fixed bandwidth at any center frequency. — draws its name from white light in which the power spectral density of the light is distributed over the visible band in such a way that the eye’s three color receptors (cones) are approximately equally stimulated. in statistical sense, a time series rt is characterized as having weak — if {rt} is a sequence of serially uncorrelated random variables with zero mean and finite variance. strong — also has the quality of being independent and identically distributed, which implies no autocorrelation. in particular, if rt is normally distributed with mean zero and standard deviation σ, the series is called a Gaussian —. an infinite bandwidth — signal is a purely theoretical construction. the bandwidth of — is limited in practice by the mechanism of noise generation, by the transmission medium and by finite observation capabilities. a random signal is considered “—” if it is observed to have a flat spectrum over a medium’s widest possible bandwidth.